Thursday, August 20, 2009

With arms high and heart abandoned

Can I just say that God is incredible? Because it's true. :) I can say for the first time in a long time that I am consistently reading my Bible and spending time with God every morning. It's the first thing I do when I get out of the shower. Well I get dressed first, but you get the point. I make sure that I allow at least 15-20 minutes for me to read and spend time praying. Let me tell ya, I can tell a huge difference. My attitude in the mornings has been so much better. I don't struggle as much throughout the day with stuff that just drags me down. And my view on life is more God-focused, like it should have been all along. Let me tell you how all of this came about. WARNING: it could be and probably will be somewhat long...I apologize, haha.

As many of you are aware if you read my blog at all, Louisville and I haven't been best friends since I moved up here. I'll spare you the details of why, but it all reached the boiling point last week. I was packing to come back to Louisville after a week off from school, and it had been a great week- time in BG, time with close friends, time at home- I really didn't wanna come back. I was leaving home and was in a horrible mood. Instead of putting my iPod on shuffle like I normally would do for the trip up I-65, I played my worship playlist like my momma suggested, and my mood improved drastically in the 40 minutes from my house to the apartment. That night, I decided that I NEEDED to start reading the Bible daily. It was the one thing that I was missing, and every other area of my walk was suffering. It's always been a weak point for me. Even while being discipled by Matt Haste, teaching 8th grade Sunday school, and serving in multiple postions on BCM Council, a daily quiet time wasn't something that I did. In fact, it was rare. And while I knew it needed to be a priority, I pushed it aside with everything that I was involved in. Everything else was masking how much I really needed the Word in my life. Getting a dose of it on Sundays and at Bible studies throughout the week ain't enough people. Anyway, when I moved to Louisville and left all of that behind, the holes started to show themselves. I had filled them with my list of activities for at least the last 4 years. When I did attempt quiet times throughout college, I would last maybe a week, if that. Then it was back to my routine. When I moved, I didn't have Living Hope and BCM stuff to keep me occupied when I should've been reading my Bible and spending time with God. I didn't have a church home or a community of people to support and encourage me. To be honest...it sucked. I felt alone, I was angry and frustrated, and I really didn't like living in this city. So...after my drive back to Louisville, I decided that on Monday morning, I was getting up at 6 so I could have time to read and pray. And I did. Tuesday, I did it again. And again on Wednesday, and...let's just say I haven't missed a day since then. I love it. I just picked a book of the Bible at random and decided on Acts. I'm reading a chapter a day, journaling about what I read and what I got from it, and spending a few minutes in prayer before and after. God is so good people. Each day He shows me something that I need to work on, and I'm learning. God is showing me, using the early church, where I need to grow, where I need to step up, where I need to just let Him take control...it's so awesome.

I just think it's cool how God grabs hold of us when we think that life just sucks. I'm not gonna say that I hit rock bottom and that life was miserable, but for the first time in a long time, I really felt pretty low. Isn't so cool that it's in those moments that God grabs us and holds us close to Him?? When we finally realize that we NEED Him, He's faithful; He always is regardless. Life is good right now, even if school is getting tougher everyday...but that's a completely different topic all together. :)

1 comment:

sabrina said...

way to go! keep it up!